Monday, July 30, 2007

UPDATE....Lesbian with Short Hair! Film at 11!

I’ve been lax in my posting of late because my morning blog time has been otherwise occupied by my daily watching of the live broadcasts of the Tour de France.
It’s amazing how many hours I can waste watching skinny Euro dudes resplendent in techno-color lycra propelling themselves up the side of a mountain on $5,000 bicycles……Vive le Tour!




To make up for my lack of posts I’m going to cheat and do a bullet post to bring you up to date:

  • My first paid preaching gig went very well. I resisted the urge to recycle a previous sermon and instead wrote one that offered a message that I sensed this particular congregation needed to hear. Based on the comments I received afterwards I was relieved to hear that the message was needed and welcomed.
    On a personal note, it was nice to get such positive feedback from people I don’t know. This was my first time preaching to folks who knew absolutely nothing about me before I stepped into the pulpit other than the short bio that was printed in the bulletin. I’m used to looking out on the congregation and gauging their level of connection by the expressions on their faces…smiles and nods of recognition are always good of course….but in a congregation where the minister has left suddenly and they’ve had to endure a revolving door pulpit for two months, it was natural to look out and see people sitting with their arms folded and shades of skepticism etched on their faces. Thankfully, the message did reach them and less importantly I had my ego duly pumped by all of their encouraging comments. One woman even went as far as to request when I would be preaching next at my home congregation as she wanted to attend. When I told her I’m just an occasional fill-in and I don’t know when I’ll be doing it next, she said “That’s ok, I’ll just call your church every week and ask if you’re scheduled for that Sunday”….my apologies to our church secretary! (but I have to admit it’s nice to have a groupie).
    I have another paid gig coming up on August 19th…it’s in a UCC church that has moved to its “summer sanctuary”, which I’m told is a circa 1700’s building with no running water set out in the middle of sprawling farm country. It should be fun! ;-)


  • On the it’s-time-to-stop-goofing-off-and-earn-some-money front, I have a job interview on Wednesday. A new bookstore is opening in the mall and I’ve applied to be a “bookseller,” which is corporate speak for ‘peon who organizes the shelves, is fodder for customer abuse, and makes $6.50 an hour”…..yeah, it’s retail and it may end up being only part-time, but I get to fondle books all day. If I’m going to spend a year of my life being a peon I may as well be surrounded by something I love.


  • As the summer grinds into August I have to start thinking about and planning church school for the fall. Recruiting teachers, looking over and scheduling the new curriculum, planning our opening ‘Rally Day,’ and meeting with the pastor to plan Adult-Ed for the fall. Anybody got a rock I can crawl under?


  • My SO and I are leaving on Thursday for southern California to visit her mom for a week. I plan to occupy most of my time with pool lounging and book reading with one excursion to Sea World and another to see the Boston Red Sex play the LA Angels (or the “Los Angeles California Angels of Anaheim” as they’re also known…I’m surprised they haven’t worked “USA” or “Planet Earth” into the title as well). Luckily the NY Mets will be on national TV on both Saturday and Sunday so I won’t be going through complete Metsies withdrawal while I’m in SoCal.


  • Cousin It and I are no longer separated at birth…
    I finally did what I’ve been threatening to do for the past 2 years….I cut my hair. My brief excursion into the world of the femmes has ended. I started growing my hair out in an attempt to try something new after having it ultra short for many, many years, but after spending most of the summer with my hair in a pony tail or tucked underneath a baseball cap I realized that it was time to let it go. I’m now back to looking like every other short-haired lesbian with glasses (the official uniform) and I’m once again running the risk of being addressed as ‘sir’ by unobservant store clerks, but at least now I can come home from a run, jump in the shower and be ready to go in 5 minutes without spending hours washing/combing/drying my hair like I did before (I don’t know how you femmes do it!).




Hair today, gone tomorrow.


Saturday, July 28, 2007

The Book Quiz

This is an interesting quiz...eerily true....but interesting...





You're The Giver!
by Lois Lowry
While you grew up with a sheltered childhood, you're pretty sure everyone around you is even more sheltered. Suddenly, from out of nowhere, you were tapped on the shoulder and transported to the real world. This made you horrified by your prior upbringing and now you're tormented by how to reconcile these two lives. Ultimately, the struggle comes down to that old free will issue. Choose
wisely.


Take the Book Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.




Friday, July 20, 2007

New from Apple - the iKitty...





Say hello to my friend E’s new addition to the family, a sweet little kitten named Bailey.
It’s obvious from this photo that Bailey is perturbed that her mom has not yet seen the light and is still using an antiquated PC.
Bailey will continue her protest by staging a sit-in (with her kitty butt and paws perpetually pressing down on CTRL-ALT-DELETE) until E. makes her way to the Apple store and comes home with a Mac. Should E. refuse to submit to assimilation….err, I mean “making a well-informed consumer choice made of her own free will” I shall facilitate the process by planting an iPod in her backyard. While E. is asleep the pod will sprout and replace E. with a complete and controllable replica. The replica will then make its way to the Apple store and fulfill its destiny.
Bailey will then have a stunningly beautiful silver Mac keyboard to lounge on that is not only impervious to viruses and spyware, but repels cat hair and dispenses kitty treats with a state of the art wireless remote. Is she going to get THAT from a DELL?? I think not….




"It's amazing, I can fit my entire CD library on this thing, and it's portable!"


Thursday, July 19, 2007

It's official, I'm now a pod person...

I am now the proud owner of one of these:



It’s a MacBook Pro 15” 2.4GHz 160GB HD 2GB RAM.
Ain’t it purrrty?

It was bound to happen eventually.
I’ve tagged along with my SO to the Apple store on a regular basis in the past six months as she satiated her need for techno toys… an iMac, an iPod Video, an iPhone and assorted iAccessories. It was only a matter of time before exposure to all the shiny plastic toys sitting on those blonde wood display tables got to me. It’s like shopping at IKEA…all Euro-minimalistic-like….It’s not shopping, it’s an experience. And then there’s the pod people….they saunter up to you in their I’m-so-cool-and-you’re-not Mac logoed black T-shirts, wearing white iPod looking nametags around their necks and sporting wireless microphones that magically summon your desired object from the back storeroom. You tell them that you’re just looking and they step away and assume the “too-cool-to-be-a-salesperson-no-pressure” stance but stay just within earshot just in case they need to slip in comments like “I was a PC user for 20 years and then I bought a Mac and I’ll never go back” or “You know what Vista stands for right? Viruses, Intrusions, Spyware, Trojans, and Adware.”

My trusty HP laptop just had its 4th birthday. It’s on its second hard drive and power cord, the finish is worn off of the mouse pad and it arbitrarily refuses to turn on when I want it to. I can sit there for up to 5 minutes clicking the little power button before it decides to bend to my will….how many (c)licks does it take to get to the center of an HP laptop? 126 on a good day.

I haaaaaaaaate disposing of things before I get my full use out of them, so it killed me to even consider plunking down big bucks on a new laptop when the old one isn’t officially dead yet. But I know the day is coming….the day when it won’t turn on at all, or the hard drive gives up it’s 2nd ghost, and it will probably be the night before I’m scheduled to preach and my unprinted sermon is trapped inside a dead laptop never to be seen again.

My SO was in the market for a new laptop as well (when is she not?) so we got matching MacBooks. I know, it's pathetic.
The deal Apple has going right now is what pushed me to make the move.
$200 off the price of the computer for teachers and students, $120 off the extended warranty, a free HP printer/copier, a free iPod Nano (or get $200 off an iPod video like I did), and the satisfaction of knowing that you are a Mac owner and thus superior to all the PC slogging masses out there.

Now I just need to earn some iMoney to pay off my iCredit Card which is now iMaxed out. Anyone wanna buy a used and slightly temperamental HP laptop?



Resistance is futile....




Monday, July 9, 2007

Seven Easy Steps to Discipleship


Well, my parade of worship services is almost over. I've gotten past Children's Sunday, High School Youth Sunday, and my preaching stint yesterday. All I have left is my pulpit fill in at a neighboring congregation next week.

For those who've asked, I've posted the sermon that I preached yesterday below.
I had planned to recycle this sermon and use it for the pulpit fill-in next Sunday. The preacher they had filling in yesterday didn't follow the lectionary so there was no danger in repeating a message they've already heard, but now I'm thinking that I need to go in another direction.

This is a congregation that had its pastor resign suddenly at the end of May and now they're scrambling to fill the pulpit until they find an interim.
I don't know the details of the resignation, but I do know that this is not a congregation that needs to hear the message that I preached yesterday, which was a strident call for discipleship. This is a congregation that is still recovering from the shock of losing their minister. They need to hear a message of hope, of healing, of finding one's way out of the dark and into the light.

The bulletin details are due tomorrow so I have one day to come up with a sermon title and appropriate scripture passage, Call to Worship, etc.
As usual, I trust God to lead the way.




*********************************************************

Seven Easy Steps to Discipleship!
July 15, 2007


At General Synod a few weeks ago I was inside the Hartford Civic Center along with thousands of others listening to Bill Moyers speak. Those of us sitting in the upper section of the arena had our eyes fixed on one of the four giant video screens suspended from the rafters, our attention hanging on Moyers' every word, but at one point I was distracted by movement in the floor section below. Next to the audio soundboard there was a small boy, no more than two years old, playing catch with his father.

The little boy was wearing knee-length shorts, a blue and white checkered shirt, and converse sneakers; an outfit that invoked memories of a 1950's Leave it to Beaver. As he tossed a white whiffle ball back and forth to his father, I remember thinking how idyllic this scene was. Bill Moyers was speaking about the passionate call to action we harbor in the United Church of Christ. The crowd was pulsating with positive energy. And in the midst of all this a father was playing with his young son, exemplifying the universal ideals of family, community, and relationship.
As I took all of this in I could just hear this sermon writing itself…..

And then, I watched as the father gently tossed the ball to his son, the little boy caught the ball, spun around to his left and lobbed it with all his might at an unsuspecting passerby, hitting the poor man square in the head.

At that moment Bill Moyers was speaking about the wrenching suffering that arises from poverty and injustice, and I was laughing.

I was laughing at the absurdity of my effort to capture a poetic snapshot of the moment, to find patterns of predictability in what is ultimately an entirely unpredictable world.
Events rarely happen the way we expect them to.

Our scripture reading today is for some a lesson in predictability.
It contains Jesus' instructions on discipleship. A road map for those who heed his call and set out to evangelize; bringing God's message to an often hostile world.
In contrast to other scriptural passages, where Jesus chooses to teach using ambiguous questions or parables, this passage flat out says "if you want to be a disciple this is how you do it."

Just follow these seven easy steps and you too will be called a messenger of God.

Step One: Travel light.
2. Don't talk to anyone on the way.
3. Bless every house that you enter.
4. Stay in one place, don't move around a lot.
5. Eat whatever is put in front of you.
6. Cure the sick while declaring that the Kingdom of God is near.
And 7. If any town should reject your message, shake the dust off your feet and be on your way.

It sounds easy on the surface.
Until we unpack each step and examine what Jesus is asking us to do.

Step One: Travel light. Take nothing with you, not even a bag or a pair of sandals.
We could wring a whole sermon out of this one. We could go on about the evils of consumerism and how we all tend to have too much stuff that only serves to weigh us down on our journey. But in reality, if God commanded us to hit the road without our iPod and our bottled water we could do it.
Just ask anyone who has traveled on an airplane recently.
The Gospels are full of stories of those who cast all they had aside to follow Jesus - their possessions, their livelihoods, their families and friends. Is this what Jesus is asking us to do? To give up all the things that bring us happiness, the work that gives our lives purpose, the relationships that God himself has called us to build? I don't think so.

I believe this command to travel light addresses our tendency to make things more complicated than they need to be, particularly when it comes to expressing our Christian faith.
Jesus taught a simple message. Love God. Love each other.

That's a difficult enough message for a disciple to teach without bogging it down with a bunch of extraneous creeds, doctrines, and theological litmus tests. The longer the list of do's and don'ts that we attach to Jesus' simple message, the less likely it is that it will be heard or adopted.
"Travel light," he told the disciples.
"Take only what I have taught you, and leave the rest behind."

Step Two: Do not greet anyone along the way.
This one is hard to decipher. It seems to go against the Christian understanding of mission and hospitality; but when we look at the text in its original form we learn it does not refer to a simple "hi, how are you" exchanged on the road, but to a more formal greeting that Jews were required to participate in when traveling between territories. These salutations were often complicated rituals that could take up to 3 hours to complete. In Jesus' eyes these rituals were time consuming and pointless.

Broken down from its literal meaning this step simply tells us not to get distracted from our mission. To not let extraneous side events keep us from focusing on delivering, or living, God's message. To not let the time we spend with our work, our hobbies, our obsessions, our addictions, keep us from building a healthy relationship with God, with our family and friends, with our community.

Step Three: Bless each home that you enter by saying "Peace to this House."
This is an easy one, if the only houses we enter are our own, or those of our friends and family. It's when we step into unfamiliar territory, houses that belong to those of another culture, another class, or even those whom we may consider to be our enemy; that's when we have trouble looking past what we perceive to be flaws.

The d├ęcor that is not to our taste, the cleanliness that is not up to our standards, the strange smells emanating from the kitchen, the noise of a language that we can't understand, and a bombardment of religious, social, or political beliefs that we neither understand nor accept. If we can't walk into our neighbor's house and call for peace, what hope is there for us to walk into our enemy's house and do the same?

Jesus did say: Call for Peace in EACH house that we enter. If we swap the word "peace" with "love" we'll see that we're being asked to put aside our urge to judge, to condemn, to dismiss, and to instead practice the same unconditional love with others that God offers to us. To love is to bless. And no one is exempt from receiving either.

Step Four: Choose a place to lodge and stay there; do not move from house to house.
This is a hard one for our mobile society. Either by choice or by force of situation, we tend not to stay in one place for too long. How many of us here were born and raised in this state, in this town, in this church? How many of us grew up elsewhere but now call this place home? How many of us are travelers who have chosen to settle here at this moment in time but there's no telling where we'll be five or ten years from now?

Jesus told his disciples to stay in one place whenever they entered a town so they would avoid offending their hosts. It was an act of hospitality to accept whatever one's host had to offer as far as accommodations. But once again, if we go beyond the text's literal meaning we discover that this step is espousing the advantage of putting down roots, of making connections that last, staying long enough to make an impression, taking the time to get to know those whom God has brought into our lives. People are more likely to accept the message if they know and trust the messenger.

Step Five: Eat whatever is put in front of you.
I'm convinced that my mother wrote this one.
I was once forced to sit at the dinner table until 10:00 at night with a plate of cold beef stew in front of me. I did not eat it.
This step is a hard one to follow. And I'm sure the people at Weight Watchers would prefer to cross it right off the list.

Taken literally, it is yet another call for hospitality on the part of the disciples. Don't insult the host by rejecting what he has to offer. What this step really is, is a call for inclusiveness.

The disciples were heading out into the world of the Gentiles and Jesus was in essence giving them permission to ignore the Jewish dietary laws that prohibited them from eating certain foods. To not only avoid insulting the hosts, but to let the gentiles know that they were legitimate recipients of God's inclusive message, regardless of whether they adhered to Jewish law or not. The same message applies to us today. As Jesus taught, it is not what we put in our mouths that defiles us, but what comes out of our mouths.
We live by our words, by our actions, and performing religious rituals does not absolve us from discipleship. So a modern reading of this text might be:
It matters not what we do in church, but what we do outside of it.

Step Six: Cure the sick while declaring that the Kingdom of God is near.
This is the one that baffles us. In Jesus' day curing the sick meant casting out demons, and that is not something we learn to do in Sunday School. Although I'm sure there are a few Sunday School teachers who wish they had that ability.

Today, in most cases, we can cure the sick, with medicine, technology, and old-fashioned TLC. But just as in Jesus' day, the illnesses we encounter aren't always physical; they can be emotional or spiritual.
And it is our presence, our compassion, our hope, that Jesus tells us to rely on. These are the tools that God has given us to cast out demons, and as disciples we're meant to use them.

The second part of this step, tells us to declare that the Kingdom of God is near.
Theologically we can talk about the Kingdom of God as either being something that will happen in the future during the end times, or something that we can build in the here in now….we need God's help to do it, but we have the power to make it happen.
Regardless of which Kingdom of Heaven theology we subscribe to, step seven is the one that we mainline Protestants struggle with the most. It is a call to evangelize. To go out into the world and proclaim God's message.

Too often we equate the call to evangelize with television preachers or street corner prophets. We dismiss it as the work of those who go door to door leaving scriptural tracts in mailboxes or who corner us in public places asking us if we have accepted Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior. This is not the New-England UCC way of proclaiming God's message.
We prefer to let our actions speak for us. We work tirelessly for the poor and the marginalized. We enact policies and support laws that protect the powerless and promote inclusiveness in our churches and in our communities.
We live our Christian faith in our every day actions.

But when the news media seeks out a spokesperson to get the "Christian perspective" on an issue, it's not our voice that is being heard. God's message of love, forgiveness, and grace for all is not what we hear emanating from the pulpits of those doing the evangelizing in the world today. Yet theirs is the voice of Christianity that the non-Christian world often hears, and thus all Christians are assumed to be the same.

The world does not know that we exist.

I spoke at a Unitarian Universalist congregation last summer, a denomination that champions social justice and equality but has moved away from its Christian roots. The topic of my sermon was Progressive Christianity and how it differs from what has become known as the Christian Right. After the service several people came up to me and were curious to learn more about our denomination, the United Church of Christ.
One woman said, and I quote:
"I thought all Christians were the same, they were all narrow minded fundamentalists or biblical literalists who only cared about abortion and gay marriage, while ignoring the plight of the poor and the oppressed.
I didn't know that there were Christians like you."

Our voice is not being heard.
Yet we continue to remain silent, out of fear of conflict, or fear of causing offense, or fear of being pegged as a religious zealot.
There's nothing wrong with letting our faith speak through our actions, in fact this is what Jesus commands us to do. But Jesus also tells us to not be afraid to use our voices. To speak out in the face of religious hypocrisy and injustice. To refute the Pharisees when they accuse us of being weak or immoral because we dare to associate with the outcasts of society.
To show the world an image of Christianity that we believe Jesus intended us to promote.
An image of love, and forgiveness, and grace for all.

This is not an easy thing to do.
In fact, Jesus got himself killed for doing just this.
But the cost of discipleship is often high.
Jesus sent his disciples out like lambs into the midst of wolves.
And he asks us to do the same.
We may not be asked to literally die for our beliefs, but we're being asked to step outside of our comfort zone. To wear our faith on our tongue as well as on our sleeve.
And we don't have to ring doorbells or grab a bull-horn and stand on a street corner to do it.
We need only speak up and identify ourselves as Christians when we hear others using language that promotes bigotry or exclusion in any form.
And the next time we feel called to express our opinion on the issues of today, we can simply say "Well I am a Christian, and this is what Jesus taught us to do…."

This leads us to the seventh and final step:
If you come to a town that refuses to hear the message you have brought, shake the dust off your feet in protest, and be on your way.

This one is a lot harder than it sounds. It's not easy to walk away from those who reject us. To just leave them be without doing everything in our power to convince them of how wrong they are and how right we are. It's even harder to walk away when we know that we are wrong but pride is keeping us from admitting it. This step requires us to let go. To admit that we're not always in control. That we can't always predict the way things are going to turn out.
That sometimes we just have to trust God to take care of what we can't.


I found this out a few weeks ago when organizing the service for Children's Sunday.
Organizing a Children's Sunday is like trying to coach a pee wee soccer team.
You kind of herd the kids in the right direction and hope the ball goes in the goal.

The night before our first and only rehearsal I sat down and wrote a detailed list of everything that we needed to cover to be ready for Sunday.
I even envisioned how the rehearsal would go. I would explain to the kids what they needed to do, they would listen intently and then they would proceed to do what I told them to do.

Needless to say, the rehearsal did not go quite as I had planned: I spent 15 minutes trying to get them all to stay in the same room while I discussed their assignments. I distributed neat, color coded folders with all the needed bulletins, scripts, and hymns inside, which they proceeded to dump all over the library floor because no one received the color folder that they actually wanted.

Once we got everything sorted we moved to the sanctuary to practice.
We weren't 5 feet inside the door before one child had her shoes off, two were sliding up and down the pews on their backs, one turned on the sound system and was in the pulpit yelling into the microphone, two were in the back of the church looking for trouble in the narthex, one had the collection plate and was threatening to use it as a Frisbee, and one was in the choir loft dangling a stuffed tiger over the balcony.

For the next 30 minutes I had them run through everything that they needed to do while they wandered off, asked questions unrelated to what we were doing, insisted on going to the bathroom every 5 minutes, and generally carried on as if I was just a voice buzzing in the background.
Can you tell this is my first year teaching Sunday School? Can you tell that I have very little experience trying to control a group of hyper-active children?
Would it then surprise you if I told you I came home that night with a giant grin on my face?

I'm learning as I'm going, and as trying as nights like that night can be, I love working with the kids. I like seeing them learn new things, ask questions, and figure out what it means to be a disciple of Jesus.
Come Sunday the kids pulled it all together and did a fabulous job.
I wouldn't have predicted it, but the service came out even better than I expected.

Like the little boy in the Hartford Civic Center who shattered my idyllic imagery when he threw his ball at an unsuspecting stranger's head, there is no such thing as predictability.
You can't make a list of things to do and expect to follow it without fail.

There's no such thing as seven easy steps to discipleship.
There's no such thing as seven easy steps to anything.
Life is unpredictable. Life is messy.
Life refuses to fit into our little categorical boxes no matter how hard we try to stuff it in.

What it comes down to is that we're not always going to be perfect disciples.

We're going to set out on journeys and find that we're carrying way too much stuff.
We're going to stop and talk to people along the way and get distracted from what we set out to do.
We're going to be guests in people's houses and say and do things that can be considered less than hospitable.
We're going to get bored with where we are and insist on moving on to somewhere new.

We're not going to eat everything that is put in front of us.

We're going to forget that the Kingdom of God is not some far off never-never land that we'll never see, but it is instead a description of a world that we have the power to create in the here and now.
We're going to continue to feel uncomfortable expressing our faith verbally and avoid challenging those who claim to speak for God….because it so much easier not to.

And we're not going to shake the dust off our feet and walk away from those who reject us or our message. We're going to hang around too long hoping that they'll come to their senses or we're going to walk away carrying resentment and anger.
We may be disciples but we're also human.

Ultimately the purpose of discipleship is to enact change, to transform ourselves and our communities into the Kingdom of God that Jesus envisioned for us two thousand years ago.
If life was predictable and never challenged us to think on the fly, we'd never learn how far we are capable of going. We'd never discover the abilities we didn't know we had.

As author Diane Butler Bass so eloquently expressed in her book Christianity for the Rest of Us:

"Transformation is the promise at the heart of Christian life."

Discipleship is not about personal salvation or getting everyone else saved, it's not about practicing the politics of exclusion or moral purity. It's about the promise of transformation.
That by God's mercy, we can change, our congregations can change, our world can change.

So as we walk out of this church today let us remember that we are called to be disciples of Jesus, not just in our church lives, but in our whole lives.
And all we have to do, is remember these seven easy steps:

Travel Light
Stay focused
Love all
Build relationships
Be inclusive
Use your voice as well as your hands
Learn to let go, and let God take care of the rest.


Blessed Be





Friday, July 6, 2007

All kitties go to heaven




Some of you may remember my post a few months back asking for prayers for my friend E's kitty cat, Murphy. Murphy was suffering from kidney problems and unfortunately earlier this week her little body could no longer handle the strain and E. had to make the painful decision to have her put down.
Murphy was 17-years-old and she had a long and happy life with E, but as anyone who has ever had a beloved pet knows, the choice to end their suffering by ending their life is one that none of us ever wants to make.

Murphy, who hadn't eaten in six days and was disoriented to the point that she found it hard to stand, spent her last hours in a warm patch of sunshine in the back yard. She then surprised us all by finding the strength to climb out of her carrier in the vet's office to explore the open waiting area, seemingly looking for the source of the Jimmy Buffet music that was playing overhead.
E. shared with me later that Murphy loved Jimmy Buffet and the two of them used to dance together while listening to his music.
Serendipity.

E. shared a poem with me that she says helped her make the decision to let Murphy go.
I made it to about the fourth line before I started bawling, and I doubt anyone who has been faced with this decision wouldn't do the same.

Rest in peace, our dear Murphy.
And as you frolic in kitty heaven, remember those who loved you, as we remember you.


THE LAST ACT OF COMPASSION
(S Hartwell)

She lies there gently breathing,
And she'd like for you to know,
That she's reached the final crisis
And it's time for her to go.
She needs a little help now,
To ease her from this life,
There's nothing left but suffering,
You can see it in her eyes.
The vet has got the answer,
To end her pain and fear,
That last act of compassion,
For a friend you love so dear.
So save her from those last days,
She deserves a final peace,
It's a mercy, not betrayal,
To ease her into sleep.
I know your heart is broken,
Though the pain, in time, will ease,
And at Heaven's gates she's waiting,
On the threshold of a dream.